Saturday, August 27, 2005

I got my thing together

I got my thing together. I got a job. I got someone I love and loves me. What else can I want...but today for some reasons I feel down. It is my second weekend from work. I was excited to have this come. I waited for this but all because of one comment I feel down...I know it is a little over sensitive of me but it made me feel this way...

It ruined my day just like that...so all I could ever do is take it here and let it out.

All because of one simple comment...

On second thoughts...it is probably not on one comment. I have been seeing things last night that triggers me like that. I feel bad, I feel sorry for things I have done in the past that I didn't see it the way I do now. Had I seen it this way I would have done better. Nicer.

Forgiveness to one's self is one thing I never learn to do. I used to...but after so many times of trying my brain or is it the heart? got weak and forgot the skill now.

"We are responsible for what we tame" -Le Petit Prince...that is also another thing that let me down...we have to give our turtles away today. They have made us sick last month of Salmonella. It was tough and we cannot risk getting it again. I really have grown to love them very much. I mean why not? They are so adorable and... peaceful and... content. A very relaxing site to see after a long day's work.

Letting go is a skill we are never equipped. And why not when we need it so much...maybe because we are not supposed to let go? We are supposed to cherish?

Friday, August 19, 2005

Moon

The moon is too beautiful tonight.
She leaves me breathless
It is too bad I can't take a photograph of her.
But then I remembered...
My husband said I could spend my first pay check just for myself.
Hmmmmm
I can get a new camera.
Maybe

Friday, August 05, 2005

Happy Turtles

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Life's really been complicated lately. I am looking for jobs online and in the newspaper daily since my working permit is out already for 2 weeks now. I want to start working right away because I need to and because I have been patient waiting for this for awhile. I also have to hurry and master the driver's handbook for California so I could at least take a test and be issued a permit then practice driving on real streets. My husband and I are also trying to start a new project which might benefit us in the future so all of this is really getting stressful for me. Inlcuding the fact that I am calling home a lot to see about a transaction done for me by my parents. Very frustrating sometimes. It is just good that my husband is patient and very supportive when I get down and depressed.

It is also good to see in the morning that Turtle and Mrs.Turtle are happy like that, contented with their simple life. So refreshing.