Skin

Birth

Birth of Autumn right in my own apartment

My Window

Captions anyone?

Something Not So New

Our beloved Turtles have gotten us Salmonella which made us very very sick.

So we decided to give them away to a friend of ours who owns a pond and didn't mind the fact that turtles have salmonella.

That same weekend, my husband got me two (2) gold fishes and we set up our 80 gallon aquarium into this. I know you don't see the gold fishes there. We also added around five feeder fishes to them that the turtles didn't eat so now they are happy all swimming together. I didn't get a good shot of them yet but I will!

I got my thing together

I got my thing together. I got a job. I got someone I love and loves me. What else can I want...but today for some reasons I feel down. It is my second weekend from work. I was excited to have this come. I waited for this but all because of one comment I feel down...I know it is a little over sensitive of me but it made me feel this way...

It ruined my day just like that...so all I could ever do is take it here and let it out.

All because of one simple comment...

On second thoughts...it is probably not on one comment. I have been seeing things last night that triggers me like that. I feel bad, I feel sorry for things I have done in the past that I didn't see it the way I do now. Had I seen it this way I would have done better. Nicer.

Forgiveness to one's self is one thing I never learn to do. I used to...but after so many times of trying my brain or is it the heart? got weak and forgot the skill now.

"We are responsible for what we tame" -Le Petit Prince...that is also another thing that let me down...we have to give our turtles away today. They have made us sick last month of Salmonella. It was tough and we cannot risk getting it again. I really have grown to love them very much. I mean why not? They are so adorable and... peaceful and... content. A very relaxing site to see after a long day's work.

Letting go is a skill we are never equipped. And why not when we need it so much...maybe because we are not supposed to let go? We are supposed to cherish?

Moon

The moon is too beautiful tonight.
She leaves me breathless
It is too bad I can't take a photograph of her.
But then I remembered...
My husband said I could spend my first pay check just for myself.
Hmmmmm
I can get a new camera.
Maybe

Happy Turtles

Life's really been complicated lately. I am looking for jobs online and in the newspaper daily since my working permit is out already for 2 weeks now. I want to start working right away because I need to and because I have been patient waiting for this for awhile. I also have to hurry and master the driver's handbook for California so I could at least take a test and be issued a permit then practice driving on real streets. My husband and I are also trying to start a new project which might benefit us in the future so all of this is really getting stressful for me. Inlcuding the fact that I am calling home a lot to see about a transaction done for me by my parents. Very frustrating sometimes. It is just good that my husband is patient and very supportive when I get down and depressed.

It is also good to see in the morning that Turtle and Mrs.Turtle are happy like that, contented with their simple life. So refreshing.

Turtle's Mating Dance

The mating dance of this species is very elaborated and interesting to observe.

The male swims towards the female and starts caressing her face with his long front claws.


He might also swim around her in circles. He might also strike her front shell lightly with his claws (this looks as if his front legs are trembling).


If she is receptive, she will accept him, otherwise, a fight might start.


The mating itself takes about 15 minutes.

If after 45 minutes, the female is not receptive to the male's dance, you should remove her from the tank and try again in about two days.

Source of Information: http://reslider.free.fr/breeding.html

We got a new turtle for a playmate for our male turtle and naturally we picked a female one. The moment we placed her in the new 80 gallon tank that we got, our Turtle started acting weird around her so I had to check the internet to know what is going on. The captions above are the information I was able to gather.

These pictures are taken on the day she arrived, July 12, 2005. We just call them now Turtle and Mrs.Turtle.

Currently we are preparing a small tank where she could possible lay her eggs.

These turtle specie is called the Red Ear Slider or RES.

My Take of San Francisco

Notre Dame Victoires Church


View from Hyatt


The beach


Houses opposite beach

Mason Street?

All photos taken on father's day 2005, my first ever visit to San Francisco.

Someone To Turn To

Something happened yesterday. Something I have overestimated and bounced back to me. I can say I have done my best but this is where it will have to end. A friendship that could have gone a long long way can no longer be. It is just good to know when something like this happens to me there is always him I can turn to. Always.

Thank you

Strange Sunflower Dream

I dreamed the other night that I was out in the field picking very beautiful and in full bloom sunflowers. Sunflower is my happy flower. I thought of that when I heard the song "I'm walking on sunshine".

In the morning, something sad happened so I took a walk to my favorite spot, the park across our apartment complex. This park is like my place of solitude when things are not good. I always find my way to this park when I don't have the answer to my questions and most of the times I find my answer there...

I looked for a bench to sit down where there is shade. Once I settled down in the bench I was very surprised because I saw a bunch of dead sunflowers in front of me. They were still standing erect just like in my dream but dried and dead. I felt a very odd feeling because I remembered my dream and in my dream they were blooming and now I am staring at them and they are all dead. Could this mean anything? Strange.

In that spot I also saw a squirrel climbing up the tree. The first time I saw a squirrel ever was on my wedding day. So squirrels have significant meanings to me.

My First Cactus

He got me last Monday my first cactus. I had a collection of cactus in my hometown in Philippines and I even started one in Japan too but I did not stay there long so now I want to start all over again. This will be the first one of my collection.

She is called Confederate Rose (Agave parrasana) .

I have learned that she is a monocarpic. A plant that dies after flowering, although it may take several years to flower.... Very surprising. Let's hope she does not flower. The irony of it. But maybe I can split her into several pots so if one flowers there will be some others left.

Busy

Yes I am busy. In deep thought. Very deep.

Hahaha! That's my favorite model right there!
What do you think?

My Lily

If we shadows have offended,
Think but this and all is mended--
That you have but slumb'red here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentle, do not reprehend.
If you pardon, we will mend.
And as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to scrape the serpent's tongue.
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call.
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin will restore amends.

--Shakepear's MidSummer Night's Dream--

I Do Get Bored

Moving here and being out of job while waiting for my visa was a decision I made a year ago or so. I have been warned that I could get bored here but if that would be an excuse not to come here nothing would really happen.

I have been doing well for the past months but this fifth month, I just woke up and realized I am bored. I have been so proud to tell friends no I am not bored, there is so much to do around the house but I guess I have come to the end of the line and I will just have to accept it I do get bored.

From hereon I will just be praying harder that my visa will come sooner then I can start applying for jobs and do my interviews and then I will be busy. And please do not get me wrong I am not complaining...I just came to a realization that this really can come. So far it has been all good and God has been really gracious with us and have taken care of all our needs. My husband has been really strong and mature and responsible and has been taking care of me so much better than what I had in my mind knowing the fact that he is ten years younger than me. I am proud of him. At least I already did my finger printing a couple of weeks ago so I am just waiting for the results. Just waiting.

My Mother In-Law Is Good To Me

Just this Saturday...

1. She and my husband suprised me for a date with her to a pedicure, my first pedicure here in the United States.
2. She took me shopping to buy gifts for Father's Day for my husband and I to give his Dad since we cannot afford that just yet.
3. She got me a nice pink skirt and a cotton blouse perfect for summer
4. We had lunch at one of my beginning to be favorite mexican stop, Chipotle
5. After going with her with the rest of her shopping we stopped for yogurt, Chocolate .
6. She went shopping more and found herself a purse and a wallet (that she very much needed) and got them and she decided to get me the purse that I was looking at too.

Father's Day

I can see you holding a little child, my child, our child, walking here sometime in the future

Revisiting Harajuku

The TeaHouse at the Harajuku Temple

I think they called this a tower, I'de call it a gate...

The bridge inside the gardens

All pictures taken on January of 2004.

Sacramento Black Bridge

When most of your life is spent learning how to cross bridges chances are you would learn to appreciate them

Thirty First

Visit : Self Portraits If you wish to view the complete album.

Squirrels and Me

When I told my Mother In-Law excitedly that I saw a squirrel on our wedding day she gave me a blank confused look.

I have been wondering why...Then going to my husband's school I saw this one and took a picture of it and just then did I realize my Mother In-Law is used to seeing them and I am not. We do not have squirrels in Philippines nor did I see any in my six years of stay in Japan. I told my husband that and he said ohhhh...now I can I explain that to my Mother In-Law and then she would understand my fascination over squirrels.

Fairy Land

Philippines is tropical so our soroundings look very different than that of here in America. Japan is very much oriental too, still different...

The picture above is what I would call a fairy land because I only see those on fairy tale books that my Mother bought for me when I was a child. So when I walked by the park at his school, Sacramento Community College I thought wow fairy land for reals minus the fairies...Who would have thought I would be able to visit this land and see one.

I wanted to take a closer view of the ducks but that was hard with the camera that I have.

Sacramento Capitol

He took me driving around Downtown Sacramento Saturday night just after church. It was a beautiful night...very beautiful. If I have a catalogue of memories that night would be one of the highlighted ones in my life.

His Mother's Flowers

From Mother In-Law's Dining Table last weekend while waiting for them getting ready to go to church.

Coming to America

We were elated yesterday to receive a receipt of my application for my visa adjustment to live here permanently. This means we are one step closer to getting my working permit.

I came here as a tourist thinking that we will not be getting married within the year but we changed our minds which is... for the better.

The thing that we are trying to achieve right now is just to get me a working permit basically so I can start working. Along with that comes a bundle of fear deep inside me. Last night I actually layed in bed staring at the dark thinking this is it! I have to be brave.

I never learned to drive because in Japan it was always safe to travel by train and it was considered the best way to travel. I mean their trains their are on time to the last minute of its schedule and there is a train departing almost everyminute. I can even sleep in those trains on the way to work and back. The driving lessons like everything else in Japan are ridiculously expensive too and I can't even afford to take a leave from work to take those lessons.

Now when my working permit is ready which they promised would come within three months (two months from now), that means I have to be applying for jobs again, doing interviews, learn how to drive, and find my way around this town. Then, when I get hired I will also have to learn to adopt to the American working environment and adjust to my new co-workers. At the end of the day I will have to focus on my new driving skills. Everything is going to be new to me. I am just very nervous.

Well, when I moved to Japan I did not speak their language and I managed to find a job, transport by train of course, I got lost several times and yeah I worked and learned the language there in the workplace itself. You would wonder how I did that but I do too. And if I did it in Japan with all of that I can do it here unlike the Japanese, Americans speak english you know!

It's Happening

Last weekend I asked him to join me and do more things with me that I like to do even if it's not his kind of things to do. I saw them happening one by one. Well someone said in life make lists so I thought this would be a very good list to start with

• He watched Finding Neverland, Mulan, Lilo & Stitch with me, not exactly his kind of movies.
• He let me play the Coyote Ugly CD in his car because I like it (instead of his hiphop and trance cds) even if its scratched and old.
• He considered putting swimming with me at the pool after work above an appointment with our new car dealer just because I wanted to go swimming.
• He earned points for doing well at his job and he got me a set of steak knives out of it.

And that is just for the past 3 days too.

Birthday Flower

I got her as a birthday flower from him last February and I have never seen her bloom again. Everybody thought she will just die but she didn't.

Too Early For Christmas

Bahay-Kubo of Philippines

It is probably too early to talk about Christmas now but I remembered some vivid memories from childhood while watching the Finding Neverland last night.

The scene where they spent an afternoon at a cottage reminded me of how one Christmas, my mother decided that we spend it with our family friend that lived in a Bahay-Kubo in one of our lands in the Philippines. This piece of land in Bagontaas, Bukidnon used to be theres. But at one time the farming was bad and they needed money to buy more pesticides or probably to last them till another harvest so they sold the land where there Bahay-Kubo (house) is erected to us.

My mother shopped for groceries, a basket of canned goods and pasta, milk coffe and goods a family would need daily and a bag of rice. She also shopped for simple toys for the kids. Then we went there and spent our Christmas Day with them.

It was one of the most memorable one I ever had in my childhood days. I remembered their floor it was made of bamboos, very shiny but it had space in between the bamboos and you could see the ground beneath it. There were litters in the ground and chickens moving around. They had six children I think but I saw only two bedrooms. Everyone slept on the floor on a banig (woven leaf and dried for mat). In the kitchen there were piles of chopped wood and dried corn leaves stocked and they were cooking special delicacy for the day and chatting very happily. You could smell the fire from the wood that was used to cook. The kettle used to cook was actually black because of the fire. And on the ceiling you see a basket turned black with smoke and time which stored dried fish or left over food. It was hang there to make sure that the cat or the dog won't reach it. A sack of rice would be standing in one corner and outside the door a banana still in its original stem hanging waiting to get ripe.

My mother taught me that day...Christmas didn't have to be grand, as long as it was shared with someone, especially someone who can appreciate it, it would be a happy one.

Painting Source: pinoyarte.com

Server-Crashing Paris

You might like check the website that was news to have crashed because of too much attention from boys. At least that's what they said.

Adrants has something else in their minds though.

As for me I printed the coupon because I love Carls Jr.

So what do you think?

Are You Sure Daddy?

"It's all grown-up. Sort of."

Some people have all the love. We were down looking at a dealership yesterday for a possibly new car for me. This lights caught his attention. They gave him a test drive he liked it. He gave his Dad a call. He said why not a Porsche? But he had in mind our future.... He is a Street Racer but he is doing this for us. I have never been so proud of him. This is his best decision ever.

He is really blessed he can just call and say Are you sure Daddy? And he mimics him Are you sure Daddy? And that was it, he said yes and we got ourselves a new car. The All New 2005 Jetta 2.5.

Gather Me Moss

"A rolling stone gathers no moss"

A rolling stone that is what I have become...those are my plants and I intended to set-up my collection of cactus once again in Japan like I had in Philippines but apparently it turned out it wasn't meant to be my permanent home so I had to abandon them. This made me very sad but I am willing to heal my wounds and move on with whatever is left of me and be where I should be.

So I am going to start all over again from scratch and by all means gather me moss.

My Bridge

The Yellow Bridge of Downtown Sacramento

I grew up in the Philippines, lived in Japan for 6 learning years and now I am here in Sacramento, California. This is my new bridge to cross and hopefully in time Sacramento will become my new home.